May Merriment

May Merriment

Jessica Elie, Humor Columnist

Why are oak trees so forgiving? Every May they turn over a new leaf! 

May is a fun month. From silly holidays like Star Wars Day to heartwarming ones like Mother’s Day, May has it all! This month is also a great time to laugh, whether it’s because of excitement at the finally decent temperatures, or because you need a break from studying for those AP exams. So, here are some funny stories. Will they make you chuckle? They just MAY. 

In Bocholt, Germany, there was a victim trapped in a high school, prompting firefighters to be called. Sounds scary, right? Nope! Because this victim was not a person, but rather an inanimate object. A final exam was stuck in its safe, as the lock had jammed. The school called the local fire department, and they were able to saw open the safe and get the test back on track within an hour. It was quite the ordeal, but I’m sure that this hour-long test delay was one of the happiest moments of the students’ lives. 

In Texas, a woman got essentially the largest discount in history. At a Goodwill, she spent $35 on what she believed to be an ordinary, cheap statue. However, it turned out that this purchase was, in fact, a centuries-old marble bust that had once belonged to King Ludwig I of Bavaria! The sculpture depicts a son of a man, Pompey the Great, whom Julius Caesar defeated in war. The sculpture was stolen from Germany during WWII, so there have been people on the lookout for it. Imagine searching for a priceless sculpture only to find it in the hands of a random woman who legally purchased it for $35. Even more amusing must have been the woman’s reaction when she heard of the value of her new art piece. Here she was thinking it would be a nice addition to her foyer, to discover that other people thought it would be a nice addition to the San Antonio Museum of Art. Anyway, I think the moral of this story is to always shop at Goodwill because you never know when you could stumble upon something worth a million dollars. 

I hope you enjoyed these stories as much as I did! Goodbye, and have a great summer!